The Dark Jee Cheng

Lately I met up with him, the Dark Jee Cheng. He was with me all the time, grew up with me, even. He gave me strength when people bullied me. He suffered with me when people isolated me. And he was never truly born until that day, that year 2001. It was when I did something terribly wrong and people started to treat badly. The Dark Jee Cheng and I hated girls, no less hated as well. That was when we bullied girls, a lot, hell lot. We somehow felt satisfied, let them feel our pain! But that was also when we met her, the girl named K. As we didn't know how to impress girls, with the fact that I was also born with the lack of chinese education talent, we did many many stupid things. This in fact made K hated us more. Yet K was in same class as ours for five whole years, we guessed we never really gave her good thoughts. Being isolated, being applied to the stay-away-at-very-first-sight rule, being back stab-ed, being taken as the "shame" of the batch, being disliked by K, the Dark Jee Cheng grew strong. He hence made me to want to succeed even more, which, although not too successful, I was still managed being average. He didn't want to give up and so did I.

When most people chose to start adventures at faraway lands, the Dark Jee Cheng and I stayed back, travelling the path less taken by many. And there, we found hope. New environment, new people, new love, yeah, she's M, and a new start! Bits by bits, we discovered things we didn't see before. We were too eager to prove ourselves that we were blind to more important things. Friends do care about us, just their ways are different. We were blind to that one. Like today, the battery of my car went dead, but still the three of our friends still waited with us until help arrived.

Hey, the Dark Jee Cheng, you are my vengeance, you are my hatred, you are strength to keep on going. But hey, it's enough now. I will believe in what others believe in me. Thanks for your company all these years, without you I wouldn't get this far. I will accept you as part of me, but you will never influence me anymore. Never.