Journey To Maturnity-In Another Girl's Opinion

Again, I awoke and looked outside the window beside me but what I saw was yet another thick darkness. It must have been some four hours since the train, which I was in now, departed from Tanah Merah. This journey I traversed was to pursue hope for both my family and I, to find a job at Kuala Lumpur.

Father’s legs are paralyzed, a result from a recent accident while Mother has to take care of the family. My brothers are yet too young, thus it is up to me to ensure their survival.

The train journey was indeed painful and hardship seemed to be endless.

For one, the night winds were so chilling that the pain was suffered even by the bone. Most of the time, to get some warmth, I had to rub my hands and place them on my cheeks and ears. Another thing was that the old man next to me who I saw him look at me with such lustful eyes. Avoiding him, I had to go to the canteen coach, where most passengers gathered, and waited there throughout the night. It was really troublesome but it was not enough to deter me. For my family, for a better future, I had to continue this journey.

Traveling alone is scary sometimes, especially to a sixteen-year-old girl like I am. People will be trying to take advantage on me. But it is this traveling experience that aids me in mature person.

Some five hours later, through the window, I could finally see the Twin Towers. And far behind them, the dawn sun slowly rose and shined majestically. Here, the train journey ended but another journey had only started.

by-sacredsword

Growing Up-In A Girl's Perspective

Growing Up
I wonder why many people don’t like to grow up for I think it is a wonderful process. I can get many things from it. For one, I will have more freedom as I grow up. I can do things like going out with friends in night time, going for a vacation by myself or even taking a girl out for a date without having my parents to restrict when to come home. In financial aspect, I will be given the rights to manage my own money, to make my own spending plans. I will also be able to make my own choices on what I want instead of my parents deciding which is good and which bad for me.
Growing up is a path that I traverse in order to become a better person. As I grow up, I will obtain many experiences and memories. It is these aspects that aid me in developing my thoughts, making them more rational, more self-conscious. With this, when faced with problems, I can deal with them confidently. I will take them as obstacles which I have to break through and get better outcomes later. Only with growing up that I will learn how to think in such way.
Furthermore, growing up enables me to see the true world, that is very different from my childhood’s fairytales. Let’s take friendship as an example. When I was a small child, my best friend was whoever person whom sat beside me, whom borrowed me his or her colour pencils or as simple as the one whom shared food with me. But when I grow up, I am more exposed to the real world and in real world, best friends are very rare. It teaches me to appreciate those who are still by my side.
Growing up really is a merry. Not only will it make more freedom available for me, it leads me to become a better individual, which then opens up my eyes and opinions towards everything that happens around me. Thus, growing up is not to be feared for it is a path that every people should walk.

by-sacredsword

Bungalow & Old Apartment

I thought it was finally over but it was not. Mother started it again and Father yelled back with all the volume his throat could afford.
“Why did you give your number to another woman?”
“She is a client! A CLIENT! STOP THAT OR I”LL…”
“WHAT? HIT ME AGAIN?”
How I wished I can scream out loudly! But as I was taken as if I was invisible, caught between a fight of foolish adults, I stood up and rushed into my room.
I did not know when but as I touched my cheeks, I could feel tears streaming down ceaselessly; I was crying. I had not idea how many times I had cried since that year. That year, Father successfully became a Chief Executive Officer of a company while Mother, the chairman of the Women Society. From an old apartment, we moved into a big bungalow, for a better life, or that was what they told me. However, it was actually a beginning of a nightmare.
Father went home late every night that Mother often suspected that he went looking for another woman. He could spend time on his so-called work but why could he not do so on me? Mother was not much different too. She was always away from home, helping, advising other women on how to educate their children with love, to spend more time with them. But where was her when I needed her the most?
I missed the old apartment we used to live when we were poor. Unlike now, we only ate the same fried rice that Mother used to cook for every dinner. Father and Mother never fought each other and I was very grateful to have been born into such family. The most unforgettable thing was how Mother treated Father after his work. She would comfort him with her sweet voice, warm complexion and, the most interesting part, her seducing eyes. This was why I felt they have left something very important in that house.
“Ann, I’m sorry. Let’s sleep together for tonight.” came a voice from outside and I knew it was Mother’s.
I agreed and went to her room. Father and Mother had separate rooms now, with a thick, black wall kept separating them. So much hatred I had on that wall that I dared not touch it even once.
“No, Ann. You sleep with me.” Father insisted.
I could not bear it any longer! With all my might, I punched that wall as if it was my sole enemy. Fresh blood was then rushing down from my fists, pain piercing throughout my fingers. However, the feelings of disappointment and anger deep inside my heart were more powerful, so stronger that they made me forget the pain on my fists, so potent that, for a moment, I forgot how to cry.
“I don’t want to be with ANY OF YOU! I want to be with both of you! BOTH OF YOU!”
There was a dead silence. Then, Father and Mother looked at me with their tear-filled eyes and blank faces, as if they were stricken by a force. They faced each other and then, just then, they smiled, even in a rather embarrassed way. Tightly, we hugged each other. I could at last feel the warmth I had long dreamt for. Father and Mother had found the thing they left in that old apartment. It was love. Love.

by-sacredsword

Ah Min-Someone I Respect

To many people, Ah Min is a worthless person. This is because he is special from us; he has Dawn’s syndrome. Despite his illness, he still leads a normal life independently. Working as caretaker of my school, he often wears grey
T-shirt and the same faded trouser. His boots, which were given by Headmaster three years ago, shine brightly when he puts them on.
If you look at him, he looks like a Mongolian. His eyes are small that when he laughs, they almost disappear from his face. He has small nose, chubby cheeks and bud lips. On his left cheek, there is a big, hairy mole. He tells me everyday that the more hair that grows on the mole, the more happiness he will get in the future. Unfortunately, happiness itself seems to be away from him.
He has short arms and small hands with stout fingers. On his left shoulder, there is a tattoo which resembles the alphabets “MM”. He told me that it was a tribute to Marilyn Monroe, his idol. There are also two toes missing on his right leg, lost in an accident last year; he was cutting grass with the cutting machine, where suddenly, he accidentally cut his own toes!
He is a man of few words. He seldom speaks and only speaks when necessary. But what I find interesting in him is, despite his low profile, his humorous part. For example, when you really look at him, he will give you a thumb up, followed by a generous smile while moving his eyebrows up and down. Another example is that when he cries, he makes that funny nose-blowing noise with his handkerchief.
Most of my schoolmates do not really like him but I am the opposite. To me, Ah Min is a kind person. Once, there was a Standard One student, waiting for his parent alone at the school gate. Ah Min saw him. He gave him a lollipop and waited together with him for an hour. But his good deeds were mistaken by the student’s parent. Not only was he not thanked but he was also cursed with rough words. Still, he never regretted for helping the boy.
Moreover, he has positive thinking. Everyday, while he is working, my schoolmates will call him with words like “nerd”, “scum”, “worthless bastard”, “so cai” and many more. But never once does he feel offended or upset. He explains to me that perhaps those fellows do not truly understand his condition; he even feels sympathy for their foolishness.
As a worker, he is very hardworking. He is always the first person to arrive school and always the last one to leave. Though there is no additional salary offered for overtime, he still works more than he is supposing to. In fact, he does it almost everyday! Furthermore, he never takes his leaves. I remember he told me:
“I must work harder. Then I’ll not be fired. Then I can be independent.”
Ah Min is special but his heart is what the most normal person does not have. He is the person I respect, the person I look up at.

Embrace!

This is my first post and i don't really know what to write. Basically, a blog is supposed to be a place where you can write anything you want, let it be hell or heaven. Well then, here goes nothing. After waiting for some five months, SPM results were finally announced, and for me, I am quite satisfied with them. Still, they don't really qualify for scholarship applications, here i mean JPA, Sime Darby, Petronas, etc. I don't really have big, typical dreams either, you know, like being a doctor, a lawyer or maybe an engineer that will make my pockets fat when i grow up. Instead, i want a job that i like to do, a job which satisfies me, money does not really matter. For this i applied for the Graphic Designs course at Universiti Tunku Abdul Rahman, simply UTAR. I got it but then with second thoughts, i decided to take Sixth Form. Why, people asked. I guess i'm not quite prepared to go out to the real world and live independently, and that the Form guarantees a better future, or that's what they told me. Guess i won't know if i don't try it, huh? After taking part in the Form orientation programme, i found out that i can actually do what i didn't during my Fifth Form, which i admit, was not that meaningful. I want to be someone people know, to truely take part in activities and learn how to socialize properly with people. Then again, the real journey starts tomorrow, 'till then i'll embrace it! Embrace!